what would you choose?

sleepydecision

Probably I would choose Fallout 4. Maaaaan dat game. I hope my laptop is strong enough to play this game on min requirements.

This pic reminds me that I still didn’t finish Katawa Shoujo yet. sigh ~ I should finish it sometime. But then again, Fallout 4 is out.

I was joggin recently and I snapped some pics while the sun was shining. It was really relaxing haha.

weg2

weg1

So bootyful.

In lab, I did produce some fluffy cake as a product. The pic doesn’t really show it but you have to imagine it like little cake crumbles gathered together.

fluffycakeproduct

How unconvenient you can’t eat them ~

I also had some fun with some basic highlighters ~

markersketches

How golly.

Recently I feel very exhausted and need some time out. I really want to have a lap pillow from time to time ;u;
Also I remember how VLK1993 told me how he hated chemistry, though he is studying chemistry and just want to draw all day long. Drawan professionally. I’m getting these feels, too. But life ain’t just easy and you have to pay your bills with your skills.

I wonder if I’m just searching for excuses to not going to that artisty direction. I really have self-doubts about my decisions at life. Maybe I’m just not satisfied with university life and myself. To drawan is my only escape route of that right now. I really kick back and it let’s me forget about my worries and kinda sadness for some time. Sounds like some kind of drug, eh?

I’m conflicted with life, love and work. Really happy that drawan doesn’t fall in one of these categories. I wonder how the other guys are handling their life, because it seems like it doesn’t goes all that pretty for me. I would love to talk with Yotam Perel about that. He chose the way of being an artist, but it seems like he would know how I feel (also he is a swell guy).

But I guess my mindset will be the path of a chemist, no matter what. I really take my hat off to the artists who chose to follow their passion. Yea, I’m scared of that step.

EDIT 13.11.2015:
So Friday 13th happened and you know. It was really bad for me. Lab happened. That’s all I can say about. I did one stupid move and ugh… I just hope it’ll end well haha. I acidified my solution too much. It supposed to be on pH=5 and I wasn’t aware that there was an organic phase to cover it up. I completely forgot in the middle of the process. Now I’m writing about this I feel less pissed. I can just laugh it off because there is barely hope. Now being so desperate about lab is not the whole truth. I did sign myself up for this hell. It isn’t mandatory but it does teaches me whole new techniques to synthesize stuff. I can imagine having kinda fun when the lab isn’t filled with thousands of people. And if there are thousands of people cramped in some labs in addition that there is barely enough equipment there gotta have to be sacrifices, am I right? I wonder why I am putting up so much efforts in lab when in the end it is just futile. Maybe it’s because I am kind of a perfectionist. I have decent grades and little mistakes results to self-doubts: I am not doing good enough… I feel like I’m losing and wasting time.

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